Blogs

Behind any feeling that traumatizes us, there is fear. And if you gather the strength to look your fear in the eyes, it's like a reflection in the mirror; you can see a lot, sometimes not very pleasant and even painful. But only by seeing your reflection can you, if you wish, correct something: tighten, finish, reflect, practice.
🗓️ 29.10.2026
✍️ Author: Inna Klymenko
👍 3
👎 1
👁️ 1486
⏳ 4 min read

If you have decided that you are left alone – are you betrayed by someone or have you betrayed yourself?

Behind any of our traumatic feelings lies fear. And if you gather strength and look your fear in the eye, it's like a reflection in a mirror, you can see a lot, sometimes not very pleasant and even painful. But, only by seeing your reflection, you can, if desired, correct something: adjust, finish, reflect, train.

Fear always points out a wonderful opportunity, a chance, an exit, a resource that guides and pushes towards something. No one can scare us as much as we can, our thoughts can be very destructive. And it's true. For example, one of the basic needs of women is for the man to be faithful and devoted to her, and if she develops a fear of being abandoned, betrayed, or rejected, the woman feels isolated, lonely, and unloved, even if these are only her fantasies, far from reality. It's like in childhood, every little child experiences such moments when the mother has to go somewhere and someone else stays with the child for a while, in the child's reality and fantasies he feels abandoned, but in reality, everything is quite different.

Fear creates space for the hormone of fear and tension – cortisol. Love creates space for the hormone that, by the way, is produced during sex – oxytocin. This is to say that people themselves model their hormonal background. Feeding fear or love – it's just your choice.

Also read: How to get through a breakup. Top 6 rules..

So, if you have decided you are left alone, let's explore what is the resource of your fear of betrayal. What is the reverse side of the medal? On one side – it is betrayed by someone woman. And on the other - true to herself, who feels unique, irreplaceable, loved, great for this man. And here is a huge resource, a stimulus for developing femininity, status, personal and spiritual growth. It is important to understand what you must do every minute, day, night, morning, and evening. You have your path to the «true to herself woman», but there is a «mandatory program»:

  1. Take care of your body, otherwise, it can unexpectedly take revenge on you. Develop a habit of being in contact with your body – this is about sex, sleep, food, health, and so on. If it happened that you never listened to it and don't understand what it's about, start with walks, massages, yoga, and pay attention to your sensations, everything else will happen by itself – the body is waiting to be heard.
  2. If you want something, act until you achieve it. The sign of life is desire; nurture desires in yourself, make sure there are many of them every day, this is about pleasures, work, achievements, career, financial flows, and so on. Watch yourself; if you really want something, give it to yourself. If you lost interest, then it wasn't necessary, give risky desires time to «lie in wait» and fulfill them only if the desire persistently follows you for a long time.
  3. Be open to everything new. Develop the habit of introducing something new into your life every day. Food, clothing, routes from home and back, books, movies, activities, theories, etc., change something, especially if you're scared, lazy, or unwilling. Our brain is lazy, so it looks for ways to optimize, simplify, which is why we so easily become attached to the same things, pleasures, routes, and from this, we certainly do not become smarter.
  4. Forget about what «people will say», they are always imagining their own stories (even when they talk about you), why involve yourself in someone else's stories; write your own and let it include people close to you in spirit, values, dreams, and meanings.

And fear is just a basic emotion, and if you see the other side of the coin, it's the path to the happy version of yourself.

iPsycholog - Your psychologist online.

How to order a free consultation?

Create an anonymous account
Create an anonymous account
Choose a psychologist for consultation
Choose a psychologist for consultation
Choose a psychologist for consultation
Choose a psychologist for consultation
Start a consultation with a psychologist
Start a consultation with a psychologist
Betrayal is always very painful and difficult. You can never be prepared for betrayal.  
That's when the understanding comes into your life that things will never be the same, that "the ground has been pulled out from under your feet" and you don't know how to live now.

Betrayal as an indicator of a relationship crisis. How a woman should respond to a man's infidelity

Betrayal is always very painful and difficult. You can never be prepared for betrayal.
That's when the understanding comes into your life that things will never be the same, that "the ground has been pulled out from under your feet" and you don't know how to live now.
 
Translate the following text into Russian. If the text contains HTML structure, keep all tags and only translate the text within the tags. If the text is a set of symbols and letters that make no sense, leave the line as it is:

When the body activates its emergency plan called illness, it means the only way to draw our attention to something very important in our life. Long live the symptom for the sake of good!

Psychosomatics or a Symptom for Good. A Case Study.

Translate the following text into Russian. If the text contains HTML structure, keep all tags and only translate the text within the tags. If the text is a set of symbols and letters that make no sense, leave the line as it is:

When the body activates its emergency plan called illness, it means the only way to draw our attention to something very important in our life. Long live the symptom for the sake of good!
 
Our body is our wisest Teacher, and if it activates the emergency plan of illness, it means it's the only way to reach out to us in order to draw our attention to what is happening in our life.

What psychosomatics is trying to tell us. A client case.

Our body is our wisest Teacher, and if it activates the emergency plan of illness, it means it's the only way to reach out to us in order to draw our attention to what is happening in our life.
 
This crisis does not open new opportunities; it has come to teach us something. Charles Darwin believed that the most adaptable to change survives. And now, those who quickly realize and accept the fact that old skills and experiences no longer work and begin to learn to quickly make the right decisions for themselves in new conditions of uncertainty – they will not just survive, but become flexible, agile, and able to find their place in the new world.

How to Survive a Crisis Caused by the Pandemic. Top 3 Rules.

This crisis does not open new opportunities; it has come to teach us something. Charles Darwin believed that the most adaptable to change survives. And now, those who quickly realize and accept the fact that old skills and experiences no longer work and begin to learn to quickly make the right decisions for themselves in new conditions of uncertainty – they will not just survive, but become flexible, agile, and able to find their place in the new world.
 
Quarantine is not just a vacation or holiday. These are physical restrictions that will be effective if everyone responsibly takes care of their health and is attentive to what is happening outside. In other words, speaking the language of psychology, it also means taking care of the mental and emotional sphere.

How to Survive Quarantine. Top 5 Rules.

Quarantine is not just a vacation or holiday. These are physical restrictions that will be effective if everyone responsibly takes care of their health and is attentive to what is happening outside. In other words, speaking the language of psychology, it also means taking care of the mental and emotional sphere.