Our emotions and thoughts "attract" certain people and events into our lives. Can we influence this? As fantastical as it sounds – we can!

Let me explain with an example: when we wake up in the morning in a bad mood or perhaps we woke up in a good mood, but:

• on the way to work some "kind person" was rude and "splashed venom" on your happy face
• or suddenly (because you had free time and wanted to occupy your mind) you started recalling events (not very pleasant from the past) and spoiled your wonderful morning with your own thoughts

Know that at that moment, you either stole or allowed someone to steal a decent chunk of energy that could have become a new project, plan for the evening, or simply good well-being. And you've attracted events into your life that will most likely change your plans.

In other words, the emotions you allow yourself to feel during the day or the thoughts you allow yourself to think can become the cause of the fulfillment or non-fulfillment of your dreams or plans.

Also read: The body reacts to emotion in 90 seconds. How to use this time correctly..

So, where to start? Begin with focus. Here's an example, if a person knows they are holding a sharp knife, they understand that if they allow themselves to be careless, they can get cut. If they get cut, then there's wound care, unpleasant sensations in the body, and loss of time for recovery procedures.

If you allow yourself to be inattentive to your thoughts and emotions, the result will be the same - loss of time, unpleasant sensations in the body, etc.

Also read: Why it's important to allow a child to be angry and how to do it correctly..

Therefore, it is important to learn to keep your plans, dreams, or intentions in focus as if it has already happened, and to clearly imagine the emotions you would feel as a result. Then it's easy to catch the moment when you let negative emotions or thoughts that destroy your plans into your life and say to yourself "Stop! I don't need to go there!"

So, where do I need to go?:

• Firstly, you need to determine your real dream, desire, or goal. Not the one that was instilled in you as a child for being a "good girl" or a "good boy". But the one that is truly important, the memory of which brings a state of harmony and creativity. This desire, dream, or goal most likely runs like a red thread through your entire life. And if you finally decide to realize your plan, you will definitely not allow yourself to get caught up in negative emotions or thoughts. You will be busy realizing your dream!
• For this, you need to understand what comes easily to you in life and what your "thing" is. Because what seems natural to you might be "high flying" for another person!
• If you can't understand what your "thing" is, try to recall what brought you true joy in childhood. Here it's important: not what parents encouraged or forbade, but what you could do for hours when you were alone?
• Next, think about a person you envy, or rather not them, but the qualities you either can't see and accept in yourself or due to upbringing and experience do not allow to manifest. Think about what this person does? What are they like? Why are they loved? If you honestly answer these questions, you will ultimately get a plan for conscious development.
• And finally, answer this question: If you earned "all the money in the world," what emotions would you experience and what would be your further plans? Use the "5 Whys" technique, created by Sakichi Toyoda. It will help you understand the true reason behind your thoughts.

For example, when I earn "all the money in the world" I will lie on the couch and do nothing. Why? Because I'm tired. Why? Because I work a lot and don't get pleasure/deserved payment/development? Why? Because I don't like my job? Why? Because I'm bored? Why? Because it's routine and tomorrow will be the same.

The answer to the last question is the key to the problem, solving which a person learns to create their own story where dreams always come true: What can I do right now to turn every day from routine into an interesting and exciting journey of my life?

The answer is clear – we ourselves, through our daily actions, emotions, and thoughts, create our destiny, and everything is in our hands because it's only our choice. If you feel you can't cope, take care of yourself and see a psychologist.

Also read: Psychologist online, what is it?

iPsycholog - Your psychologist online.